
i’m not any good am i
April 8, 2011i’ve been thinking about unlocking all my posts and just come clean as a step for me to move on to the next milestone
and like how life just likes to play me and throw me off course all the time, i had to receive a mindfucking news at 2am in the morning. what a joke
sometimes i wonder if i am the one who lands myself in these situations. like some sadist who causes her own pain and suffering. i was doing good for quite awhile but apparently not.
i muster my guts to move on from one situation and another just arises.
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and with the shock of my swell on my neck and the past few nights of reflection,
i am starting to doubt my capability of being a good enough friend,
maybe i just am not a good friend after all,
i can’t help in any one’s problems other then to listen and not say anything constructive or helpful
what good am i if i can’t help them? pretty useless i guess.
i think i fear that there will come a time when i may prolly turn back to see no one behind me anymore cos i was this useless and weak a friend
its almost 4am and i am still being mindfucked. wow.